it shocks me sometimes. my thought process. the little slivers of hate that manage to trip through my brain at the most inconvenient hours, those being the ones where i am supposed to be calming down, in preparation for my entry into the land of nod.
the relevant example being, how much i would love, deep down secretly, to write a hate letter to so many individuals in my life. a letter detailing those characteristics and tendencies about them that make my blood boil, my hands itch to slap them, my tongue burn and long to slash their self-esteem to shreds. terrible, i know. but it's true, and i hope that my admittance of the truth might be the redeeming quality in this not-so-disney post? anyway i'm sure there are those who are secretly curious to know what some of these aforementioned letters may say. and while i am not going to fully unleash my inner bitch and write in full said letters, as this is my blog which i hope some people still read, and as i have neglected it for so long, i shall disclose a line here and there without revealing the intended recipients, or getting too personal. i hope you appreciate this and that nothing is taken the wrong way.
"it amazes me just how f***ing judgemental you still are, who are you to sit on your high horse and condemn the world, you do realise you are so far from perfect yourself, that you could not even see perfect in the horizon with a top-of-the-line telescope?"
"some days, it's just pure amusement to me the way you apparently believe that you are just so entertaining. if you had a brick wall behind you and an audience before you, we could make a fortune selling tickets to 'naive, the comedy'. "
"really? it's been six months since high school and you still haven't grown up and realised that you. are. an. adult.?! honey, i want to have a front-row seat to your induction into the Real World."
"yeah, okay, but if it were HER inviting you? you'd probably, most definitely go. or at least consider trying. "
"so, are we really 'Biffles' or are you only 'here for me' when it suits you?"
"aww, i miss you too. i wonder how many other people you've said that to and followed through with, 'we should catch up, it's been too long!'. save it for someone who believes you. "
"don't be sorry. it's your decision. bull !@#*ing sh!t. could you GET more subliminally judgemental?"
you get the picture. and it's not a pretty one. caricature artists of the French revolution could produce more attractive scenes than the ones sometimes flitting through my overprocessed brain. a big bag of weird does not even begin to describe the beginning of what goes on in there sometimes. hmm, perhaps i should take up yoga or whatever the neurotic's answer to AA meetings are, give the attic a good spring cleaning. or would kick-boxing be a more appropriate solution. and so my dear fellow bloggers and blog-readers, i hereby invite you on the comments section of this post, to express your views, whether they be opinions on the twisted inner-workings of my mind, or perhaps just use it as an open, anonymous forum to vent your spleen (to use one of my favorite cliches) in the way of some of your own one-liners from guiltily considered hate letters. remember, there is no judgement here.
Do zobaczenia.
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